Verse

Romans 4:23-25

The words “it was credited to him” were written not for him alone, but also for us, to whom God will credit righteousness—for us who believe in him who raised Jesus our Lord from the dead. He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification.

Quote

Boris Yeltsin,

"We don't appreciate what we have until it's gone. Freedom is like that. It's like air. When you have it, you don't notice it."

Joke

I recently visited the “World’s Tiniest Wind Turbine” exhibit. Honestly, not a big fan.

Verse

Galatians 3:13,14

Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us, for it is written: “Cursed is everyone who is hung on a pole.”  He redeemed us in order that the blessing given to Abraham might come to the Gentiles through Christ Jesus, so that by faith we might receive the promise of the Spirit.

Quote

Nelson Mandela,
"Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world."

Joke

I just saw two nuclear technicians getting married.

The bride was radiant, and the groom was glowing.

Verse

Proverbs 11:1,2

The Lord detests dishonest scales,
   but accurate weights find favor with him.
When pride comes, then comes disgrace,
   but with humility comes wisdom.

Quote

Wayne Dyer,

"How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours."

Joke

Stop thinking of them as “hot flashes.” Think of them as your inner child playing with matches.

Verse

Proverbs 10:9

Whoever walks in integrity walks securely,
but whoever takes crooked paths will be found out.

Quote

Ernest Hemingway,

"There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow men. True nobility lies in being superior to your former self."

Joke

I told my doctor I could only hear buzzing. He said don’t worry, it’s just a bug going around.

Verse

Proverbs 8:10,11

Choose my instruction instead of silver,
   knowledge rather than choice gold,
for wisdom is more precious than rubies,
   and nothing you desire can compare with her.

Quote

Babe Ruth,

"It's hard to beat a parson who never gives up."

Joke

What type of party do you throw for a dog’s birthday?

A ball.

Verse

Exodus 3:7-10

The Lord said, “I have indeed seen the misery of my people in Egypt. I have heard them crying out because of their slave drivers, and I am concerned about their suffering. So I have come down to rescue them from the hand of the Egyptians and to bring them up out of that land into a good and spacious land, a land flowing with milk and honey—the home of the Canaanites, Hittites, Amorites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites. And now the cry of the Israelites has reached me, and I have seen the way the Egyptians are oppressing them. So now, go. I am sending you to Pharaoh to bring my people the Israelites out of Egypt.”

Quote

Pythagoras 525 BC,

"In anger we should refrain both from speech and action."

Joke

Why do candles love birthdays?

They like to get lit.

Verse

Romans 2:12,13

ll who sin apart from the law will also perish apart from the law, and all who sin under the law will be judged by the law. For it is not those who hear the law who are righteous in God’s sight, but it is those who obey the law who will be declared righteous.

Quote

Friedrich Nietzsche,

"All truly great thoughts are conceived by walking."

Joke

Why do people put birthday candles on top of a birthday cake?

Because you can't put them on the bottom, can you?!

Verse

Philippians 3:8,9

What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith.

Quote

George Washington,

"Associate with people of good quality if you value your own reputation; for it is better to be alone than in bad company."

Joke

Where would you find an elephant?

The same place you lost her.

Verse

Philippians 2: 1-4

Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

Quote

Margaret Brennan,

"Any place can be romantic if you're there with the right person. Being able to travel well with a partner is a great read into whether you can make it as a couple."

Joke

What do you call a rabbit with fleas?

Bugs Bunny!

Verse

Phillipians 1:9-11

And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God.

Quote

Ayn Rand,

"Every man builds his world in his own image. He has the power to choose, but no power to escape the necessity of choice."

Joke

What looks like half a tree?

The other half.

Verse

Ephesians 6:11,12

Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Quote

Mary Kay Ash,

"Everyone has an invisible sign hanging from their neck saying, 'Make me feel important.' Never forget this message when working with people."

Joke

Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth.

Then it's a soap opera.

Verse

Ephesians 4:20-24

That, however, is not the way of life you learned when you heard about Christ and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

Quote

Earl Nightingale,

"We will receive not what we idly wish for but what we justly earn. Our rewards will always be in exact proportion to our service."

Joke

What has five toes but isn’t your foot?

My foot.

Verse

Ephesians 4:1-6

As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. 4There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.

Quote

James Madison,

"The accumulation of all powers, legislative, executive and judiciary, in the same hands, whether of one, a few, or many, and whether hereditary, self-appointed, or elective, may justly be pronounced the very definition of tyranny."

Joke

Why do dads take an extra pair of socks when they play golf?

In case they get a hole in one.

Verse

Revelation 22:10,11

Then he told me, “Do not seal up the words of the prophecy of this scroll, because the time is near. Let the one who does wrong continue to do wrong; let the vile person continue to be vile; let the one who does right continue to do right; and let the holy person continue to be holy.”

Quote

Sammy Hagar,

"Every year on your birthday, you get a chance to start new."

Joke

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?

Pilgrims.

Verse

Revelation 22:12-16

“Look, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to each person according to what they have done. 13I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End.

“Blessed are those who wash their robes, that they may have the right to the tree of life and may go through the gates into the city. Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.

“I, Jesus, have sent my angel to give you this testimony for the churches. I am the Root and the Offspring of David, and the bright Morning Star.”

Quote

Princess Diana,

"Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that on day someone might do the same for you."

Joke

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?

Oh, sheet.