Verse

Proverbs 1:7

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge,
    but fools despise wisdom and instruction.

Quote

Eric Butterworth,

"Don't go through life, grow through life."

Joke

Why did the kids give their dad a blanket for Father’s Day?

Because they thought he was the coolest dad.

Verse

Ephesians 1:17-19

I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit f of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe.

Quote

Og Mandino,

"Always render more and better service than is expected of you, no matter what your task may be."

Joke

Why don’t they have Father’s Day sales?

Because fathers are priceless.

Verse

Psalm 33:4,5

For the word of the Lord is right and true;
  he is faithful in all he does.
The Lord loves righteousness and justice;
  the earth is full of his unfailing love.

Quote

Vernon Law,

"Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterward."

Joke

I used to work for the paper business.

But then it folded.

Verse

Ecclesasiastes: 12:13,14

Now all has been heard;
  here is the conclusion of the matter:
Fear God and keep his commandments,
  for this is the duty of all mankind.
For God will bring every deed into judgment,
  including every hidden thing,
  whether it is good or evil.

Quote

Paul Harvey,

"I've never seen a monument erected to a pessimist."

Joke

I recently visited the “World’s Tiniest Wind Turbine” exhibit.

Honestly, not a big fan.

Verse

2 Corinthians 12:8-10

Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Quote

Nelson Mandela,

"It always seems impossible until it's done."

Joke

I told my doctor I could only hear buzzing.

He said don’t worry, it’s just a bug going around.

Verse

Genesis 11:4,8,9

“Come, let us build ourselves a city, with a tower that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves; otherwise we will be scattered over the face of the whole earth.”

So the Lord scattered them from there over all the earth, and they stopped building the city. That is why it was called Babel c —because there the Lord confused the language of the whole world. From there the Lord scattered them over the face of the whole earth.

Quote

George Jean Nathan,

"No Man can think clearly when his fists are clenched."

Joke

An old woman is sitting at a bar when an older gentleman sits down beside her.

"So," he says, "Do I come here often?"

Verse

Isaiah 2:6-9

You, Lord, have abandoned your people,
  the descendants of Jacob.
They are full of superstitions from the East;
  they practice divination like the Philistines
  and embrace pagan customs.
Their land is full of silver and gold;
  there is no end to their treasures.
Their land is full of horses;
  there is no end to their chariots.
Their land is full of idols;
  they bow down to the work of their hands,
  to what their fingers have made.
So people will be brought low
  and everyone humbled—
  do not forgive them.

Quote

Galileo Galilei,

"Who would set a limit to the mind of man? Who would dare assert that we know all there is to be known?"

Joke

What type of party do you throw for a dog’s birthday?

A ball.

Verse

Genesis 6:5-8

The Lord saw how great the wickedness of the human race had become on the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of the human heart was only evil all the time. The Lord regretted that he had made human beings on the earth, and his heart was deeply troubled. So the Lord said, “I will wipe from the face of the earth the human race I have created—and with them the animals, the birds and the creatures that move along the ground—for I regret that I have made them.” But Noah found favor in the eyes of the Lord.

Quote

Mark Twain,

"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen."

Joke

What happens if no one turns up to your birthday party?

You get to have you cake and eat it, too.

Verse

Romans 1:20

For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.

Quote

Daniel Goleman,

"One way to boost our will power and focus is to manage our distractions instead of letting them manage us."

Joke

Why couldn't the baby score in basketball?

He was always dribbling

Verse

Luke 5:22-24

Jesus knew what they were thinking and asked, “Why are you thinking these things in your hearts? Which is easier: to say, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Get up and walk’? But I want you to know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins.”

Quote

Wayne Dyer,

"If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change."

Joke

What do you call a dog magician?

A labracadabrador.

Verse

Luke 3:16

John answered them all, “I baptize you with b water. But one who is more powerful than I will come, the straps of whose sandals I am not worthy to untie. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire.

Quote

Eric Butterworth,

"Don't go through life, grow through life."

Joke

What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

Supplies!

Verse

2 Timothy 2:16,17

Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly. Their teaching will spread like gangrene.

Quote

Michel de Montaigne,

"A man who fears suffering is already suffering from what he fears."

Joke

How do you make an apple turnover?

Push it downhill.

Verse

Hebrews 2:14,15

Since the children have flesh and blood, he too shared in their humanity so that by his death he might break the power of him who holds the power of death—that is, the devil— and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death.

Quote

Paul Harvey,

"Like what you do. If you don't like it, do something else."

Joke

How can you tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator?

Easy, one will see you later, the other will see you in a while.

Verse

Romans 2:1

You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.

Quote

Elon Musk,

"When something is important enough, you do it even if the odds are not in your favor."

Joke

My wife screamed, “You haven’t heard a word I’ve said, have you?!”

What a weird place to start a conversation.

Verse

Acts 26:15-18

“Then I asked, ‘Who are you, Lord?’

“ ‘I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,’ the Lord replied. ‘Now get up and stand on your feet. I have appeared to you to appoint you as a servant and as a witness of what you have seen and will see of me. I will rescue you from your own people and from the Gentiles. I am sending you to them to open their eyes and turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me.’

Quote

Galileo Galilei,

"Who would set a limit to the mind of man? Who would dare assert that we know all there is to be known?"

Joke

I got fired from my job as a taxi driver.

It turns out nobody thought I was fare.