Verse

Acts 26:15-18

“Then I asked, ‘Who are you, Lord?’

“ ‘I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,’ the Lord replied. ‘Now get up and stand on your feet. I have appeared to you to appoint you as a servant and as a witness of what you have seen and will see of me. I will rescue you from your own people and from the Gentiles. I am sending you to them to open their eyes and turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me.’

Quote

Galileo Galilei,

"Who would set a limit to the mind of man? Who would dare assert that we know all there is to be known?"

Joke

I got fired from my job as a taxi driver.

It turns out nobody thought I was fare.

Verse

Proverbs 3:3,4

Let love and faithfulness never leave you;
  bind them around your neck,
  write them on the tablet of your heart.
Then you will win favor and a good name
  in the sight of God and man.

Quote

George Jean Nathan,

"No Man can think clearly when his fists are clenched."

Joke

I recently visited the “World’s Tiniest Wind Turbine” exhibit.

Honestly, not a big fan.

Verse

John 3:16-18

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son.

Quote

James Clear,

"Many problems are minor when you solve them right away, but grow into an enormous conflict when you let them linger. As a rule of thumb, fix it now."

Joke

I had a neck brace fitted years ago and I've never looked back since.

Verse

Isaiah 7:10-14

Again the Lord spoke to Ahaz, “Ask the Lord your God for a sign, whether in the deepest depths or in the highest heights.”

But Ahaz said, “I will not ask; I will not put the Lord to the test.”

Then Isaiah said, “Hear now, you house of David! Is it not enough to try the patience of humans? Will you try the patience of my God also? Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel.

Quote

Walt Disney

"If you can dream it, you can do it."

Joke

I used to be a personal trainer.

Then I gave my too weak notice.

Verse

Luke 23:42,43

Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.”
Jesus answered him, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise.”

Quote

Jacques Cousteau,

"People protect what they love."

Joke

What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?

An irrelephant.

Verse

Colossians 3:15-17

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Quote

Rose Kennedy,

"Life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments."

Joke

I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner—it was just gathering dust!

Verse

Exodus 3:14

God said to Moses, “I am who I am. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: ‘I am has sent me to you.’ ”

Quote

Napoleon Hill,

"The man who does more than he is paid for will soon be paid for more than he does."

Joke

What do you call it when a snowman throws a tantrum?

A meltdown.

Verse

Philippians 2:12,13
Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.

Quote

Denis Waitley

"Change the changeable, accept the unchangeable, and remove yourself from the unacceptable."

Joke

What does a bee use to brush its hair?

A honeycomb!

Verse

Philippians 2:12,13

Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.

Quote

Timothy Leary

"You're only as young as the last time you changed your mind."

Joke

What time did the man go to the dentist?

Tooth hurt-y.

Verse

Matthew 6:19-21

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Quote

Jim Rohn

"Happiness is not something you postpone for the future; it is something you design for the present."

Joke

What did the zero say to the eight?

That belt looks good on you.

Verse

Matthew 5:14-16

“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

Quote

Nido Qubein

"Your present circumstances don't determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start."

Joke

Why does a pitcher raise one leg when he throws the ball?

If he raises them both, he’d fall down.

Verse

Romans 8:14-17

For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

Quote

Elon Musk

"Some people don't like change, but you need to embrace change if the alternative is disaster."

Joke

A man arrives at a costume party with a girl on his back. "I am a turtle," he says. "Who's on your back?"

"That's Michelle."

Verse

Matthew 6:9-15
“This, then, is how you should pray:
“ ‘Our Father in heaven,
  hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come,
  your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
  Give us today our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts,
  as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation, a
  but deliver us from the evil one. b ’
For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

Quote

Robert Anthony

"When you blame others, you give up your power to change."

Joke

That car looks nice but the muffler seems exhausted.

Verse

Ephesians 2:17,18

He came and preached peace to you who were far away and peace to those who were near. For through him we both have access to the Father by one Spirit.

Quote

Soren Kierkegaard

"Our life always expresses the result of our dominant thoughts."

Joke

Do you wanna box for your leftovers?

No, but I'll wrestle you for them.

Verse

Acts 2:38,39

Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. The promise is for you and your children and for all who are far off—for all whom the Lord our God will call.”

Quote

Denis Waitley

"Change the changeable, accept the unchangeable, and remove yourself from the unacceptable."

Joke

A guy walks into a bar...
and he was disqualified from the limbo contest.